Loving the fall..

So we are having a cold front here in North Louisiana, and I am LOVING IT! It's been amazingly crisp and chilly in the mornings, which always makes it easier for me to wake up and get the day going. These days, anything that can help me get going is a good thing.

Dad's health is still a roler coaster ride- I made it a point to be at the hospital the other night when his primary care doctor came in to see him so I could get a good update on how things were going.  I felt like something was wrong when Dr. D came in with dad's nurse, AND the hospital charge nurse. Now, Dr. D has known me for years, both as a nurse, a patient, and the family member of several of his patients. He doesn't sugar coat things with me, he's honest and upfront, and tells me like it is. But, in the most gentle and caring way. He's amazing. So when he motioned for me to come out into the hallway with him, I was a little nervous. So he lays it on me. Dad is not doing as well as it apprears. His liver is excreating toxins that are damaging his kidneys, and at this point the only thing that will "fix" it is a liver transplant. But, right now his body won't survive a transplant, so we walk the tightrope between dialysis and paracentisis (draining the fluid off of his abdomen that builds up becasue of his liver disease.) And we pray that he doesn't get any infections, which at this point could kill him very quickly. so we walk the tightrope between being anxious about the possabilities, and optamistic and upbeat about recovery. It's exausting, really.

And in four days, my novel writing experience begins. I am excited and nervous and ready to start, but worried that I won't have anything to write about. Tomorrow I will start writing "morning pages", two or three pages of "stream of consciousness writing" done every morning as soon as I wake up. I'm a little interested to see what flows out of this brain of mine. Could be scarey. Probably WILL be scary. We shall see.